Start with faded tropical camouflage trunks;
they will double as swimwear if you fancy a dip later.
Then pull on a pair of rolled cotton spray-on
floral print nylon motocross jeans, which will
go great with the trippy see-through yellow
suede loafers—or mash things up with the
perforated white leather winklepicker boots
(without socks, of course; if you own socks,
burn them now or risk permanent exclusion
from membership in the haute-couture community).
On top, as a base layer, start with a
crumpled silk crepe tunic embossed with
psychedelic butterflies, the more the better.
Over that goes a western bandana shirt.
Leave the collar open—it’s spring, after all—
or try a skinny naval-themed mini-dot tie,
in burgundy, if you want to dress things up a bit.
Either way, go with a rust-speckled white
neoprene belt to make it all pop.
A short jacket is de rigueur, but you have
a variety of options as long as you keep it short:
a khaki-and-red military-inspired utility jacket,
a slim-lapelled color-blocked blazer in
grass green and heightened electric blue,
or a pink waxed denim and lambskin
motorcycle jacket (if you want to go
for something even edgier, you could even
choose a wide-striped hooded cardigan, as long
as it’s made from the last sheep of the species).
For the finishing touch, a pocket square
patterned with black gothic flowers.
If you’re going out, protect yourself from the
elements with a tropical-orange rain parka
and shimmering circular welder shades.
Hats are out this season as designers
aim for wearable practical simplicity.
Note: My information (used with a little bit of poetic license) comes from GQ, The Guardian, The Sartorialist, and Style.com, reporting on the runway shows from London, Paris, and Milan.
T. Allen Culpepper